I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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