arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
