We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
