It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
