I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
