at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
