it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
