dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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