I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize