HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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