if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
If its not for food we ain't going out.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
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