is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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