Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i think i have two assholes
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
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