Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
