i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
God, I missed his penis.
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