Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
