Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
