Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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