just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize