that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
