if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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