porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
