if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Randomize
