hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
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