so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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