she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
