the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
