should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
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you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I fill condoms, not promises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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