this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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