is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
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I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
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You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
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