we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
