just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize