Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
