so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize