no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize