I think i sorta joined a cult last night
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
