she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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