Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.