Wat do u mean how?
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.