Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
