seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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