just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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