is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
There's always time for handjobs
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Randomize
