i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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