WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
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