Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
