doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
