that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
