put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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