WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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