Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
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