omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
