this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize